Archive for the ‘Southern Belles’ Category

Hi everyone!

Tel and I arrived yesterday at a spectacularly remote cottage in the Ozark mountains here in Arkansas, and this is where we will be spending the rest of our honeymoon.  More on that at the end of this post!

Since the last time we wrote (and I have lost track of days, so I have no idea when that was!!), we left Lousiana and drove to Little Rock, Arkansas, where we spent a relaxing night watching TV and doing laundry….just like home!  The next day, we left Little Rock for the Ozarks and rural Arkansas.  Our drive took us 4.5 hours through the countryside, along twisty, windy, steep, narrow mountain roads, and past scenery that we can only describe as both beautiful and surprising.  We *really* felt like we were in rural Arkansas, the bible belt, Jesusland…..signs along the roadway offering “free pregnancy counselling” and asking us if we’d been “saved” yet, trailers along the road that had been turned into homes, with wooden additions built on to them, and in one case, a wooden roof added to a tin trailer.  Like I said, we definitely felt like we were in rural Arkansas!!  Part of the way here, we started to see a lot of motorcycles on the road, and after we passed a sign warning us of “steep and crooked roads”, we ran into a group of a few hundred bikers at the side of the road.  We took a road called “the pig trail” to get here to Eureka Springs, Arkansas, running into more and more bikers on our way here.  By the time we got to the town, it was clear that there was a biker event going on!

We checked into our inn close to the centre of Eureka Springs, and found out that in Fayetteville, AR (about an hour away), there was a biker event called Bikes, Blues and BBQ going on, and that there were 400,000+ bikers attending the event.  Yikes.  We had chosen Eureka Springs to visit because we’d heard it was a sleepy, quiet, little artists community in the Ozarks–what folks around here call “the buckle of the bible belt” because it does not adhere to the Christian fundamentalism found in so much of the rest of the Ozarks. Actually, the motto of the town–where misfits fit–really appealed to us.  We were NOT expecting thousands of bikers!  But, honestly, I suppose that is part of the “misfits” mentality that made the town so appealing.

We took a trolley ride around the whole town to get our bearings and found it beautiful, sweet and charming. The roads are carved into the hills, as are many of the buildings. The town twists and meanders up and down through the Ozark Hills and has countless sweet inns, charming stores, wine bars….all along cobblestone, uneven roads that require a LOT of concentration to navigate.  For our first night in town, we visited an amazing restaurant called Local Flavours, drank two bottles of vintage wine (a cab and a petit syrah) and took a pink limo back to our hotel room!

 The next day, we woke up, only a *bit* hungover, to the sound of bikers gunning their engines at 6:30 a.m. The noise, we discovered, would continue for the rest of the time we were in Eureka Springs–the first thing we heard in the morning, the last thing at night, and constantly in between.

We had an amazing breakfast at our hotel before heading to the Thorncrown Chapel, a church built just outside of town by a local Christian man who wanted to share his beautiful view of the Ozarks with others and give them a place to be “saved” if they wished.  The chapel is built entirely of glass and wood, and contains hundreds of windows; it gives you a view of the sky and mountains all around you.  After reading about it, I wanted to sit inside the chapel, and spend some quiet time meditating.  When we got there, a sign invited us to “come in and sit just as we were”–loved it!!–and the chapel itself was stunning in its simplicity.  

 Alas, my quiet meditation was not to be!  A man inside the church handed us some propaganda about the history of the church, why it was built and testimonials from others who had visisted the church and were subsequently “saved” by Jesus.  The brochure invited us to speak with him if we needed to be saved (FYI, neither one of us took him up on that offer!).  Instead of blissful quiet within the church, we had organ muzak.  Instead of a peaceful encounter with nature, we had bikers revving their engines and busting into the church.  Sigh.  Although the inside of the church was indeed beautiful, we could not find the peace there that we hoped.

After that, we headed even further out of town to see the “Christ of the Ozarks”, a 7 story high statue of Christ built to remind people of his power and protection, based on the idea of Christ the Redeemer in Rio de Janiero.  As some of you may remember, Tel and I visited Rio and caught an amazing “You, me and JC” picture with Christ the Redeemer….we were trying to replicate that moment!  The statue here in the Ozarks was not quite tall enough to have the same effect, but we sure had fun trying!  Once again, the peaceful environment that we were seeking was not possible…..and I am sure you can guess the reason!

We spent the rest of our day wandering around Eureka Springs, up and down the hilly streets and in and out of its quaint stores.  We marvelled at the diversity of the town….a pride flag right beside a second hand Christian clothing store, signs welcoming scrapbooking groups, mormon groups, church groups, bikers, seniors…..really, it was quite something!  We got a big kick out of a t-shirt hanging in the second hand Christian clothing store–Jesus saved me from my karma–which was right across the street from a sign advertising  (supposedly legal) liquid marijuana!! 

We sat and had a couple of beers on a balcony overlooking one of the main streets, and on our second beer, we got a BLISSFUL break from the sound of motorcycle engines–we heard drumming, clapping, singing–and were so excited that we finished our beers and decided to go and investigate…..and in doing so, we found the heart of eclectic, artsy, hippy Eureka Springs! A jam session held by all the local musicans and artists on the first Saturday of every month, in the town’s park. There were HUNDREDS of people with their drums, tamborines, harmonicas, etc…singing and dancing in the park. It was absolutely delightful, and it was the first time we got a break from the constant sound of motorcycle engines being gunned. It really helped us to see how amazing Eureka Springs could be had we visited it at a different time, without the thousands of bikers everywhere.

So we left Eureka Springs yesterday morning completely and totally frazzled from the constant sound of motorcycle engines.  Honestly, I thought I was going to crawl out of my skin if I heard even one more biker gun his motor!  I think I would have loved Eureka Springs at a different time 🙁

Now we are at our cabin in the Ozarks, a blissful, luxurious cottage with a hot tub for two, walk in shower, wrap around deck overlooking Beaver Lake, luxurious bed, fireplace…..we feel pampered, relaxed, indulged, happy…..it is WONDERFUL!  The resort has an amazing privacy policy, and will not disturb us during our stay for any reason.  The lake is warm enough to swim in, the surroundings are beautiful, everything is quiet.  We are in heaven!  This was a wedding gift from ma tante and uncle Dennis, and we love it!

We will write more before we go, and after a few more days of doing nothing!

Bye for now,

Mel

Hi everyone!

We are still in Lafayette, Louisiana and are just packing up to leave.  We’ve had an amazing few days here, and found exactly the culture, friendliness, fun and music that we were hoping for.  It has been AMAZING!!  We leave today for Eureka Springs, Arkansas, where we will be spending another fun-filled weekend.  And on Sunday, we check into an amazing luxury cabin on a lake in the Ozarks, where we will veg out and do absolutely nothing for four days.

My beloved mentioned in her previous post that I wandered around the Acadian and Creole museum taking notes in my little Hello Kitty notebook.  She was right, except that my notebook has a picture of a pink shoe on it…..sadly, I have not found a little Hello Kitty notebook yet!!  But the notes….yes, that is exactly what I do in museums!  I found it super interesting, mostly because I learned the difference between cajuns and creoles, something that I was not clear on before.  The museum was a tribute to the Acadians who were expelled from Canada and the Creoles–two groups that built Louisiana into what it is now.

Louisiana was settled by the English, French and Spanish, and it was actually the Spanish who were in power when the Acadians were unceremoniously booted from Canada.  It was interesting to me to see how many of them were tricked by the colonial government into deportation; after pledging *conditional* allegiance to the British crown (the condition was that they would never have to fight against the French or any aboriginal group that supported the French), there was relative peace between the English and the French in Acadie.  That is, until the English decided, in secret, to deport the 10,000 Acadians who would not swear unconditional allegiance to the crown.  Many of them were tricked into churches, under the guise of a church meeting, and then loaded on ships and unceremoniously deported.  Of the 10,000 given the boot, 3,000 came to Louisiana and were welcomed with open arms by the ruling Spanish government; they were given land, seeds, clothes etc upon their arrival, and set out integrating into Louisiana.  At that time, there were three groups of people in Louisiana: whites, free people of colour and slaves.  Within the loosely defined category of “whites” were French, English, Spanish, German, Welsh etc settlers.  The Acadians identified themselves first as Acadien then as Cadien (spoken with French pronunciation).  The term was eventually anglicised by the English speaking folks living here to Cajun (and actually, that sounds remarkably similiar to the word cadien!).  Although the cajuns were the minority of french speakers in Louisiana, eventually any white, poor, french speaking person in Louisiana was called a cajun.  The practise continues to this day, with any person with French heritage being called a cajun, when in fact they may not be a descendent of one of the 3,000 acadians booted out of Canada.  However, a teeny and gorgeous town here called St. Martinsville, has erected an Acadian memorial (which we visited) which pays tribute to those 3,000 Acadians who were so instrumental in builing this part of Louisiana.

At the same time the cajuns were integrating themselves into Louisiana, the Creoles were facing their own changes.  A creole had always been defined as a (presumably white) person born in Louisiana–at the time, generally of French, Spanish or English heritage, but born here in Louisiana.  Before the civil war, the whites, the free people of color and the slaves had well defined roles in Louisiana but after the civil war, the free people of color lost that special status, and began calling themselves “Black Creoles” (much to the horror of the white Creoles!!) to distinguish themselves from former slaves. Eventually, any person born in Louisiana became known as a Creole with the exception of the cajuns.  Honestly, things are not much clearer now!  Creole culture is now a mixture of southern, spanish, african and english cultures while Cajun culture is based on french heritage (regardless of whether that heritage is from France or from Acadie).  

We have definitely found the culture here to be fascinating and FUN in the extreme.  We have spent our days driving from small town to small town, getting lost in conversations with locals and just having an absolute blast.  Yesterday we drove to a small town called Opelousas, wandered into an amazing restaurant/museum and ordered some food.  A charming woman, Wanda (who we discovered was the owner) wandered over to chat with us, eventually pulling up a chair and joining us at our table for an hour and a half of eating and chatting……absolutely wonderful for both Tel and I, and another long term friendship, we are certain.

Last night, we went to the Blue Moon Saloon, a local bar, for Cajun open mike night…..and discovered the heart of francophone culture in Lafayette!  All of the singers/musicians were French!  And, when I asked the bartender if he spoke French, he responded with a line we’ve heard often in Louisiana: “No, I’m Texan, I speak Spanish”!!!  But a few minutes later, two men approached us asking if we spoke French….they’d been sent to us by the bartender!!….and suddenly, we were surrounded by French speaking Louisana folks who were THRILLED to be able to speak French with us.  We met a woman from Quebec, here studying at UL, who adores the culture here, and was at the saloon with her fiddle for open mike night!  We also met two other guys, Michel and Lucien, both of whom have travelled to maritime Canada in order to go to school in French, and both of whom are part of a group of people here that are quietly trying to preserve the French language in Louisiana.  We spent the huge majority of the night speaking in French, having a blast.  And the MUSIC….wow, the music!!  By the time we left at 11 pm or so, there were 4 guitars, a steel guitar, two accordians, 3 fiddles, a banjo and a triangle being played, with all of the songs being sung in French.  We also met two delightful folks from Arkansas–DeeWayne-Eddy and his wife Lauren–with whom we hung out all night and had a really great time.   Honestly, we had an absolutely amazing night and made even more friends.  I will say again that the friendliness of people here truly gives Newfoundland a run for its money (and you folks know that I do not say that easily!!!).

We are a tad hungover today, but are just heading to our car to start the long drive north.  It’s about 10-11 hours to where we are going in north west Arkansas, so we will be stopping somewhere to sleep tonight.  We will be spending the weekend in Eureka Springs, a funky, proudly-artsy, blatantly gay-positive town……all adjectives not normally associated with rural Arkansas!!  After that, we are going off the map for a few days of blissful downtime in a luxury remote cabin–a wedding gift from ma tante and Uncle Dennis!

You can probably tell what a fabulous time we’re having, especially if you’re watching my posts and updates on Facebook!  I love it here, and find the pace of small town Louisiana much better than New Orleans, where it felt impossible to NOT be a tourist. 

Thanks for reading, and bye for now!

Mel

Hi,

For those of you who haven’t heard this:  I’M MARRIED!!  I still can’t believe it and say it to someone at least once a day!

As of yesterday (Monday), we are now in Lafayette, Louisiana…the heart of Louisiana’s Cajun culture. We’ve been on the road for a week, although truthfully, it feels like a lot longer.  If you’ve been seeing my updates on Facebook, you’ll have a good idea of where we’ve been and what we’ve done as I’ve been checking in there regularly.  We haven’t had Wi-Fi for the huge majority of our trip, so I’ll start from the beginning for those that have not been following on Facebook.

The Drive

We left on Tuesday (September 20^th) at about noon.  We had a very leisurely drive to Pine Grove, Pennsylvania where we stopped at a very divey Econo-Lodge for a night. It was a completely gross hotel and we really could not wait to get out of there.  We drove a solid, easy twelve hours on Day 2 (Wed. September 21) and made it all the way to Fort Payne, Alabama after passing through Pennsylvania, Maryland, West Virginia, Virginia, Georgia and Tennessee.  Thursday (Day 3), we drove through Alabama and Mississippi before crossing into Louisiana and we arrived in NOLA (New Orleans, Louisiana) at 4 pm and checked into a B&B in Faubourg Marigny.   The drive was really no problem at all and actually, I thought it was enjoyable.

Our drive down was amusing due to the blatant differences between Canadians and Americans that always shock me.  First, the road side signs on the way down here ranged from the stupid (“It’s better to have an abortion than a baby” and “Are they making a monkey out of you?” —-> a sign by an anti-evolution group that wants creationism taught in schools) to bizarre (at a Subway restaurant: “Turkey, Ham and Bacon Sub (all turkey products”  —–> WTF?) to the more ominious (“Stop, Drop and Roll doesn’t work in hell” and “REPENT and prepare to meet thy God”.  Also, we have (so far) only run into two Americans that know where Ottawa is, and are shocked to learn that it is Canada’s capital.  *sigh*

Our most amusing episode happened in Mississippi when we stopped at some super teeny town to get gas and lunch (the only restaurant was in the gas station).  We walked in to a heating lamp with 28 different types of fried chicken, chose our lunch, and when I was at the cash register, I grabbed a copy of a local newspaper called the Jailhouse Times.  Tel and I read it during lunch and KILLED ourselves laughing….it is a *weekly* complilation of all of the people that have been arrested in Mississippi, their mug shot and what they were arrested for…..of course, there is interesting commentary along with the pictures.  Some examples of arrests: “lustful touching with intent to ravish”, “speeding between 1 and 20 miles over the speed limit”, “abscondery”, “possession of precursors” and “petit larceny”.  When we got back on the interstate, we realized that *I* was guilty of three crimes that were in that paper: Speeding (I was doing 15 miles over the speed limit), lustful touching with intent to ravish (it is my honeymoon after all!), and most amusingly, ABSCONDERY as I had taken the Jailhouse Times from the little Mississippi store without paying for it!  Did we ever get a good laugh out of that…..after Tel did a quick check to make sure we weren’t being followed by the local Sheriff!

NOLA:

We arrived in NOLA (New Orleans, Louisiana) on Thursday around dinnertime and checked into our B&B in Faubourg Marigny.  After chilling out and having a glass of wine with the manager, we headed down to the French Quarter by foot for a super yummy dinner of blackened catfish and mahi-mahi and some beers.   As the B&B was full for the weekend, we were not sure where we were going to stay, but eventually decided to rent a condo right in the heart of the French Quarter, where we spent the next three days in a blissfully air-conditioned, quiet space.  Our 4 days in NOLA were mostly spent wandering around, soaking up the wonderful, easygoing vibe of the city.  The people in Louisiana are unfailingly friendly….they give Newfoundlanders a run for their money when it comes to openness.  The city reminds me of Havana, Cuba and Valpariso, Chile….two other cities that really seem to understand “the beauty of decay”.  Truly, so many parts of NOLA are crumbling, but it works and the French Quarter is beautiful.  Beautiful that is, with the exeception of Bourbon Street’s raunchy area, which is a specatcle of strip bars, t-shirt shops, frat boys and seemingly every bachelor/bachelorette party ever held.  Honestly, just an excuse to act badly….we both HATED it.

We took two city tours while there: one on an airconditioned bus (which was terrible) and one in a horse drawn carriage (which was awesome) and ate and ate and ate!  We have had seafood every single day of our trip and it’s been amazing.  Three times so far, I have ordered a blackened dish and asked the server to tell the chef to “make me cry” with hotness…..I haven’t cried yet, but I am going to keep trying!  Tel and I also paid a visit to a music exchange store on Magazine Avenue, where I surprised her with a 60+ year old vintage trumpet.  We spent our Saturday night in NOLA at a gay bar right across the street from our condo and had one of the funnest nights ever.  It is called “Good Friends Bar” and is a small, neighbourhood joint where everyone knows each other.  We were instantly welcomed into the group and it felt like every person into their world bought us drinks and cheered our wedding and honeymoon.

 Those of you who know me know that it is very hard for me to resist being political about things, and so I am going to do that now.  My post about NOLA would not be complete if I did not talk about the effects of Hurricane Katrina on the city and its occupants. Our stupid air conditioned tour bus took us through part of the lower ninth ward, the poor and largely African-American area that was ravaged by Katrina in 2005.  Although Katrina was almost exactly six years ago, the damage is visible everywhere. A huge number of houses in the lower ninth have not been rebuilt, and still sit in a shambles everywhere.  You can see holes in roofs that were hacked out because residents went from the first floor, to the second, to the attic and then frantically (and if they were lucky) hacked their way out of roof as the floodwaters rose.  For those who were not so lucky…..well, on those houses, we saw notes from search and rescue folks indicating the number of dead bodies inside.  We drove past a painted sign on a house saying “Two dead bodies inside”, and I could not stop the tears.  Although they are trying to rebuild, it is clear how badly they have been failed by every single level of Government in the city….and truthfully, it is impossible for me to believe that this failure is not race related. We learned of the ongoing consequences of Katrina in terms of the decreased population and the lack of infrastructure.  For example, a grocery store in the heart of the ward has not reopened or recovered from the damage done by Katrina….which means that residents now have to travel a much longer distance to buy food.  SO much of the rebuilding has been done by foundations or charities (as opposed by the Government), including Brad Pitt’s Make it Right Foundation which has built 80 new eco-homes that can withstand a Katrina class hurricane (and for which he paid himself) and the Musician’s Village, a community built by Harry Connick Jr to give musicians a place to live, thus ensuring that music continued to thrive in NOLA.   Although it was interesting to learn about the area and how badly FEMA let these folks down, on my way out, I made this promise to myself: I will never again visit the lower ninth ward on an air conditioned tour bus; if I am back again, it will be because I am there to HELP, not to witness other people’s suffering.

Now we are in Lafayette after having arrived here yesterday.  It is the heart of French speaking Louisiana and we love it here.  The towns are small, there are bayous and wetlands everywhere, the people are friendly, the history is amazing. We will write a long post about it tomorrow and include pictures of our swamp tour today.

Thanks for reading everyone, and again, we apologize about not writing before now!

Bye for now,

Mel

Yesterday, under a beautiful, cloudless sky, we laughed and cried and tied the knot, literally.

After what was a relatively calm day filled with great intent, we walked down the aisle, Mel with her parents and me with my aunt and uncle.  We turned and saw a sea of love in our guests, their eyes brimming with tears and the most sincere, supportive smiles you can possibly imagine.

We listened as our officiant read two readings, the first called ‘Falling in Love is like Owning a Dog’ and the second was ‘Hands’ by Blakeston.  We each read our own vows to each other (posted below for those of you who weren’t able to hear them in person) and then the officiant tied our hands together in a traditional Celtic knot.  After the reading of the North American First Nations Blessing, we sealed our vows with a kiss (or three) to a loud and energetic crowd of people we love who cheered us on.

We went to sign the register to the song ‘To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before’ by Tom Jones, and giggled as we heard some people laughing about the song choice.  To be honest, I wasn’t sure how many people would pick up on it, as I suspected some might just think it was an inopportune song choice by a DJ who might not have been paying attention – but it was completely deliberate and cracked us up when we first decided on it.

We went back to the arches where the officiant pronounced us Wife and Wife and then we were swarmed with that sea of love that I was talking about earlier.  As we hugged and cried with our guests, we found each other’s eyes across the crowded courtyard, smiled and made our way towards each other.

After photos with the wedding party and some family photos, we walked around the beautiful grounds at Strathmere with our amazing photographer, Amanda Hayden, and spent the next 40 minutes playing in the cornfields and being complete dorks together.  It was an amazing way to spend the first hour of married life with my partner.

We came back into the Lodge to more cheering, which caught us both by surprise; we intentionally left out the ‘announcing of the couple’ part, since we thought we’d be able to ‘slip in’.  Needless to say, we felt incredibly loved.

We sat down to an amazing dinner (the rumours about Strathmere’s delicious and inspiring cuisine is all true, by the way), great conversation and old friends.  We decided that we wouldn’t kiss to clinking wine glasses, but we did offer an alternative.  For those guests who wanted to encourage kissing, they could stand at their table and sing a love song, which would yield a kiss from the blushing brides.  Thankfully, table number 9, a group of our really good friends (Trix, Liz, Barb, Maggie, Wendy, Kim, Binder) kept us kissing throughout dinner AND kept our guests entertained with their vocal abilities!

After dinner, my best friend and best person, Punk, gave a brief toast/roast and she managed to squeeze in a few of my most embarrassing moments, without actually telling the whole story on any of them – which led to a few questions as we chatted with guests afterwards.

My ma tante drew tears from both Mel and I almost instantly and by the time she was done welcoming her new niece-in-law to the family, I’m not sure how many (if any) dry eyes there were in the room.

Finally – Mel’s dad, Irwin, made his way to the podium and shared a few stories about our history, in chronological order, and welcomed me to the Cole family.

Once the speeches were done, Mel and I got a chance to thank our guests, those family and friends that mean the world to us, and the people we really wanted to share our day with.

We thought we would head out on the road today, the day after the wedding, to get our honeymoon to the Deep South started.  It turns out I fell asleep at 5 p.m. and woke up at 7:30 p.m.  We decided that an early-morning start might make more sense, so here we are, writing our first of many blog posts to come, packing, and looking at our rings, a lot.

There aren’t really words to express how important yesterday was for us, how magical it was to spend the evening with our favourite people in the world and how absolutely awesome it feels to be married.

We’ll write more once we get started on our trip.  Thanks to each and every one of you, whether you were at the wedding or not, we felt your love and we truly appreciate your support!

Mel & Tel

Mel’s Vows to Tel

When I met you, I was closed to love, my friends, my family, the world. I was so afraid of being hurt that I could not be open with anyone. That all fell away when we met, and because of you, I feel like I live in an entirely different world.

Today, I am very happy and lucky to count myself amongst the very lucky few that have found their perfect fit.  I am more loving with people and with the world in general because of how I feel about you. 

I knew after four days that one day, we would be standing here, making these vows to each other.  I also knew that I had a partner, best friend, guardian of my heart, travelling companion and someone to ride shotgun with me through life.

 I feel blessed and lucky to have found the truest of love with you, and to commit my life to yours. I promise to try, every day, to remember how lucky I am to have found you, to never let apathy interfere with the joy that you bring to my life. I promise to try and be loving and compassionate with you, in the good times and the bad times, when life is easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple and when it feels like an effort.

I look forward to discovering more of the world with you, to growing together and to growing old together, to sharing your joy and your pain, to riding shotgun through our shared life, to helping you when you need my help and to stepping aside when you don’t, to always helping where I can, and not hurting where I can’t. These things I give to you today and in all of the days of our life together.

Tel’s vows to Mel

I knew when I met you that my life was about to change forever. 

I know it’s hard to believe, but I didn’t fall in love with you because of your Hello Kitty collection or because my life suddenly became pink and really, really sparkly.

 It’s because my heart already knew yours, and that I’ve known and loved your heart for lifetimes before this. 

It’s because when my heart whispers, your heart hears it.  And when my heart shouts, your heart calms it. 

It’s because our hearts and souls take comfort in each other and give each other space, which allows us to grow and fall in love, over and over again. 

I’m constantly amazed by your compassion and humanity.  You’ve taught me so much in the past five years and you’ve opened my eyes and my heart to a world that I didn’t know existed.

 I choose you.  Only you.  I will always choose you.

Today, I promise to be your teammate and your partner.  I promise to love you unconditionally.  I promise that I will be kind to your soul and I promise that I will protect your heart with mine, forever.